Sam: I was ready to die, I was ready. I should have died. But you, you didn’t want to be alone. That’s what this boils down to you can’t stand the thought of being alone. I’ll give you this much, you are certainly willing to do the sacrifice, as long as you’re not the one being hurt.
A thought struck me about this text about this magic word of being ALONE. I think one of the things I’ve always learnt is I don’t think anyone really wants to be truly alone. I think deep down we are all guilty of this feeling, even our Sammy! As the years go by one by one our family decreases in size to the last two standing. Of course not in every circumstance, but in this relationship when we get down to the raw knuckles of the thing all they are left with is each other. Dean’s fear of being without his brother scares him to death, but why? Is this also Sam’ fear not just Dean’s. Is Sam right in throwing it out there at Dean. Is his assumption right in tackling what he fears might be the truth of the argument, or was there something else troubling Sam? Over the years we have witnessed both brothers fully alone, for quite long spells of time. The obvious hits us the audience like a ton of bricks that neither can cope in the real world, I should say their real world. Your right in thinking they both go to pieces, literally.
Both boys are in protection mode without really thinking of any consequences that may loom. They automatically go into white charger mode and think SAVE. It’s become a natural feeling that they charge in their all guns blazing. So have the writers tricked us into believing that now they wouldn’t save the other. Or is this the major twist coming up that yes in fact they would. Had those words from Sam been planted for a reason, to set up the not too distant finale? Saving people is in the remit of the shows direction, and we know it’s a contributing factor within its history. But will this be the big gesture that gets Sam back to normal, that shows us his old caring side once again? We know Sam can be a dick, but why this time when he knows that Dean would to the right thing and save him. Sam knows in his heart that this is what Dean would inevitably do. So why did he really begin to doubt it and question it. We know the deals were really behind those words when we tried earlier to salvage something from this current mess. But is this really all it is. We know that Sam also hates being without Dean and in the cold light of day refuses to live well without his brother. Like he feels guilty of carrying on his life without Dean with him. So what were the writers really trying to get at? That Sam really does want to be alone without his brother? Or the complete reverse, or something else entirely?
Is Sam better at living alone completely than we were always lead to believe? Running off to Stanford forced him to grow up. Where as Dean lived day in day out within the parameters of the Family Business. Sam was used to being without Dean for a certain time; it wasn’t until he got back together with him on a regular basis that those feelings began to change. Could it be that Sam now can’t find it easy to be without Dean, and it‘s him who struggles to cope without his brother. Has the tide changed? Is Sam trying to say we save each other Dean, but this has got to change. Neither of us can live without the other the thought of being alone completely and that scares the crap out of me, and I need you to be safe near me without going off and doing those crazy out there deals that nearly gets you killed. One scene in the past Sam tells Dean just don’t die. Dean replies I’ll do my best. We get that these two brothers get highly strung, and get into the grove with the rigs of daily life, but the true fact is, they both fear the word ALONE, not just DEAN. They both have trouble admitting the word and can’t bear to contemplate life on their own. Would life be over for them if one wasn’t ever around? Sam in season 4 with Ruby wanted to go into a suicide mission and she saved him, just so he could be with Dean again. He was willing to take out his own life as he couldn’t bear the thought of the loneliness without Dean. So I am finding hard to think that Sam really meant those words, and they weren’t from his heart. What is JC trying to tell us here, any thoughts …..